When Mentally Constipated, Quizzle Thyself :)

Are You Nosy?
Nosy Level: 80%

You have a wild and crazy imagination, and this can lead you to being very nosy as you strive to check out whether your theories are true. You get very occupied with your own thoughts and create fantastic stories out of the things that you think are happening in people's lives. It might be a good idea to concentrate more on your own life.

WAKA. At least i have a wild and crazy IMAGINATION. Can be used to entertain myself when bored. oh wells.

The Bus
Here is the analysis:

You are more concerned with yourself rather than with others. Superficially, you are a quiet and imaginative person. As you choose to sit at the back, you can converse with your friends although you do not talk a lot.

ok. this quizzes are getting kinda restrictive.

A murder in your town
Here is the analysis:

You had a dream when you were young. For you, having friends is important, so you have a lot of close friends who share the same dream and interest. You and your life companion have similar personalities.

WAKAKA. Fairly true. BUt I just don't like the way they summarise everyone in a few sentences! People are much more complicated than that! Erg!

The Mass Communicator
You have a cheerful personality and you are a naturally kind person. Your hidden talent isn't really that hidden at all: you shine among a crowd. You would make an ideal news announcer, flight attendant or model - any position that would give you an opportunity to deal with plenty of people. A tip for you is to avoid getting too deeply involved in others' personal lives - otherwise you might find yourself constantly being asked for help.

okay I love dealing with people, but I don't think I'm damn cheerful.

sigh.
Who is your dream guy?
Here is the analysis:

Unlike most others, he walk on his own path. He's creative and willing to learn about anything. Music and movies are his favorites. He's kind to everyone. You can feel his inner beauty through his words. He's comfortable among a circle of friends. He's looking for someone to share his hobbies.

Rite. Anyone has a link to a quiz on how to GET Mr Oh-so-perfect-one?

Last one..

How well will u survive in this wild world?
Here is the analysis:

You often give up before you really get things started. You may come up with a project and hand it over to someone else even before you give it a try. This is usually how you ignore the opportunity to succeed. Why don't you gather your guts and try to complete it on your own. Remember that every journey has to begin with the first step. Go for it!

Modules!

It's that time of the year again..hehe...Wel other than my two major mods which will be heartwrenchingly competitive as usual...cell bio and biocomputing n bioinformatics (yUcK!! I can't stand anything to do with computers, it's so impersonal. heh) I'm gonna take chinese with Dee n Shaz!!! eeks! can't wait! No longer at a loss and only making frens in tutorials...that time is over man...haha I guess in year one I've always thought that it's better to take mods that interest you and somehow you'll find like-minded frens in such mods, but somehow i guess that never materialised. And I guess I'm the sort who need friends to study with and keep each other in check. Plus I can be such a slacker..(thou it dussen really show I guess. heh. surface impressions) It'll be back to tpjc first three months again..oh shit...we didn't do much studying then either...hehehe....But knowing how frank they can be towards me, and vice versa, I guess getting straight to the point of studying wouldn't be any problem...I hope. Oh plus hoping to get two more mods with them...since chinese was Dee's idea, I wanna all of us to take Approaches to religion (XD2101)...I think that would be really really interesting and close to heart...and Shaz wants us to take her own psyc modules...YAY finally together again hehe:) yippee yippee!

What I want...

Universal values.

A happy family...

and I think tt should be about it.

:)

I love my life.

My dearest bro has woken me up to the possibilities that I've given up on.

No matter what, those closest to you will always want the best for you, even when you've given up on yourself. And when so much is expected of you, how can you bear to let them down?

I'll try to be the sister that you've always wanted, the one you want to be able to look up to.
I'm sorry if I've been letting you down all this while.

In a way, fnding your own niche gives you a innate warm feeling that is irreplacable by anything else.

And no other niche is best found other than in your own family. :)

And I've deleted the post regarding being on my own and not being a little girl to my Mama anymore. I've talked to her about it too...It's just not about me anymore la.

Still learning... :)

Dearest Bro.

Thanks for your honesty. In all, it's been such an eye-opener. All these years.

I can't say much now. I'm still left speechless.

Confusion

Nowadays I seem to go to sleep with a heavy heart. And wake up in the morning still feeling confused. Like I'm not moving, neither am I standing still. Just entangling up myself further into a deeper web of never ending problems. Not solving anything, not progressing anyway. Where do I start?

I'm tired lah. Take me on holiday in a plane before school starts please..
I miss the exhilaration of enjoying the comforts when you're up in the skies, everything seems permissible (aka no social protocols), within your reach, away from mundane daily rountines, away from complexities, away from the real world.
I wanna get away.



To be honest, there's no denying it.

Yes I feel stuck. I draw out my feelings only to curb them whenever I seriously consider the whole set-up of things. When I think of you. I know I should tell my heart No. Why? I don't know. And besides, I don't see any other way to calm this reluctant heart. Stagnancy.

And frankly I do feel left out at times. But maybe that's just cause of my own personality. *shrugs* I don't know lah.

I just wish people could be more honest. Direct, to my face. Or anyone else's. Enough guessing games or any random hypothesis.

I truly definitely miss people who could tell me 'hey gurl, you're wrong there' or 'well, there could be other ways to solve the problem' but ultimately I know they have my best interests at heart. And everyone else's in general.


Don't like something, just shut up and don't bitch. Try to find means to get the person to understand. To make things better. Change things within your own means. Don't make things worse.
We all have a part to play in this.





And i respect you for keeping your silence on the whole issue thus far.

As things are now.

Maybe it's better for things to be this way, to be separated. Mayb not necessarily be about competition and outdoing one another, but its more of creating more and ample opportunities for our people to learn, grow from first hand experience and shine. Coz in the long run, you would want everything to be brought to the frontline, both in terms of communication and religion. We already have so few to begin with, why not just ensure as many as possibly manage to be engaged in such stuff?



Correct me if my perceptions have any shortcomings.

Alone.

Nobody's here.

Called my mom at her office. Got the voicemail message. I haven't talked to her, like really talked to her in ages. In part, it's my fault. To a large extent. I haven't been making time for family these past few weeks. Thus the feeling of absolute loneliness.

Lab report undone. Unmotivated. To the max. Piling up gradually, continuously, exponentially.

Meeting Shaz and Dee later at four. KInda cheers me up for today. :)

Facial later on Saturday. Mom berlanja-ing.

Birthday in two weeks.

I can't face the fact that I'm ageing gradually and still feel at a lost sometimes.

I wish I was a lot stronger than I am.

But being stronger does not mean you have to face things alone, does it?

I feel sick. to the core.

I feel sick. I feel sick. I feel sick. I'm sorry but the whole situation makes me feel sick. I feel like puking out my dinner. I'm sorry but seriously does he even KNOW you?

This isn't the first time that this situation has happened to me.

And it's gonna happen over and over again.

I think i need the bathroom.

Pre-camp mood (+ sthg which i settled a LOONG time ago<--take note! I am NOT thinking abt this too much!)

So many emotions running through me...

Exasperation: I'm supposed to be finishing my lab report now but I'm stuck on a problem that i don't know how to solve...and to fully understand it requires tons of reading which i don't feel like doing...bleargh...BUT i still have to finish it up tonight by hook or by crook...must do must do...even if i sleep at 2am...

Pre-camp mood: adrenaline rush + trepidation + trying to keep an open mind... while removing all the doubts in my mind, about myself and people in general and well, clearing up what i wanna see myself doing in time to come...

I feel that the camp will be a success InsyaAllah...

On hindsight i value more the value of having initiative....
Coz people with initiative are those that make things happen... And the courage to bring forth your own ideas and sell it to others even if they can't see it at first, you just have to push on with it if u really believe it...

Rallying people around you is important to...

There's so much yet I have to learn...

And I realise i do cherish friendships deeply, though that may not seem sometimes coz I might seem aloof or distant to some people...but sometimes it's just tiring to be friends with so many people when you have things on your mind to think about...

About the thing that happened in the past, I've had it's emotional closure about a week ago, and I'm not gonna bring it up ever again especially after debating heatedly abt it with a friend online...

I did what I felt was right at that point in time. I was put on a spot and I just felt it was unfair to those people sitting in front of me and hearing what they had to say for me not to try and make things better. I'm not the sort to say bad things about others, much less untrue ones. You know that. Loyalty vs integrity. Which one would u choose? At that point in time i made the decision for the latter.

But after a few days I felt bad. You were my friend, even thou we grew apart over the years and you changed- somehow i could recognise the genuinely sweet friend I had back then- you were still a friend of mine. And friendships should be put on a premium.

I realised then that I shouldn't have even gotten involved in the first place. I should have kept my mouth shut. That's when I apologised to you. Not cause I wanted to be all chummy and sweet with you but I felt that as a friend I should have tried to be more loyal...and stay out of the whole thing.

I hated it when you didn't reply my apology. When you continued being cold and oh so professional when we had to work together. When up til now I still know that u dislike me for what I did. Friends forgive. But everyone has a choice to how they wanna react to their friends. And whether people around them are considered friends in the first place.

Anyway I've moved on from crying over the whole thing. You can choose to make something constructive or destructive out of the things you face.

Friendship. Integrity. Loyalty.
Family.
Work ethics. Leadership. Initiative.

Being true to who you are.

Oh Allah, please let me learn from the past mistakes and make me a better person who will fulfil all my responsibilities to the best of my abilities.

of family and such

sometimes i wonder...if family really breeds in you what you know about yourself and your outlook on life, then is there any way to change it? coz no matter what some things will always stick with you thru upbringing right? those slight things that u cant really put a finger on but others outside of the whole atmosphere can notify...

just noticing two mother-daughter couples on the train and seeing how similar they were...oh well. My point is, there isn't really any point. Just me rambling on..

reflections :) -progress

progress

"All progress is gained through mistakes and their rectification. No good comes fully fashioned, out of God's hand, but has to be carved out through repeated experiments and repeated failures by ourselves. This is the law of individual growth. The same law controls social and political evolution also. The right to err, which means the freedom to try experiments, is the universal condition of all progress."

-Mohandas Gandhi (1869-1948)

so you're never a failure on the first try...:)

how apt!

BLUE You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive. Find out your color at Quiz Me!

haha nah...think i lack sthg there :) oh well, happy taking the test ~*

Hiakz hiakz!

Take the 100 Acre Personality Quiz!

I'm slow meh? Maybe blur sometimes but slow??! huhhhh...hahaha but it dussen really sound like me anyway, a little too simplistic. haha. guess it balances off the first one.

sheesh. how egostic ;P